Thursday, February 25, 2010

No yell zone

Some days it feels like we do a whole lot of yelling. I'm sure many people would say the yelling that we do is deserved. We yell at Ben when he hits Bailey or takes something out of Sams hands. We yell at Sam when he plays with cords or tries to go down the steps head first. However, many nights we look back on the day and feel terrible. We don't enjoy yelling and its pretty obvious the boys don't enjoy being yelled at. For the past 6 days, we have been a no yell household. Of course, we have had a few slips, but for the most part, we've been calm and in control. What has truly amazed me is that when a situation comes up when we would normally yell, not yelling has had pretty much the same result. When Ben does something wrong, our first instinct would be to yell and then put him in time out if necessary. This week, when hes done something, we stop him, calmly explain what the issue is and still do time out when necessary. I think in some strange way, we yell to make ourselves feel better. Yelling in the moment, gets Bens attention and the behavior stops. We feel accomplished. If we get the same results and feel better about ourselves and our boys at the end of the day, why continue to yell? I'm sure Ben is loving the change since he gets the brunt of the yelling. I think overall he's been behaving better each day. I hope this is the trend and not just a faze!

On a different subject, Ben has sprouted plane arms. When a situation calls for his new arms, he will jump up in the air and throw his arms back and then run around the house like an airplane. He is too cute!
Unfortunately, Sam has not been feeling well the past few days. Look at that poor baby face.

1 comment:

Prasti said...

awww, poor sam. i hope he feels better soon!

glad to hear your new approach is showing some positive results. we usually try to address the kids at their level as calm as possible (sometimes that's hard) and save the stern, i'm not messing around voice for "special occasions." it feels like sometimes our kids get used to our voice sounding a particular way when they get in trouble that it becomes slower and slower for them to respond. kids, i tell ya!