To vaccinate or not

When Ben was born I didn't think to question anything. The doctor said a version and induction at 37.5 weeks and I said ok. He slept in a crib on his back. The thought of putting him in our bed never occurred to me. I occasionally "wore" him in a sling, but had never heard the term baby wearing or realized how many ways someone could wear a baby. He got all his shots when the doctor ordered them. It wasn't until I met some of my Lakewood mommy friends that I even considered home school as something "normal" people do.

Sam had reflux so he slept in his car seat for a while. Prasti made me a wrap and wearing Ellie was supposed to help with bonding so I "wore" her. That was the extent of me thinking outside the regular 'do it like its always been done mommy box'.

Now we're on to Zach. Finally, all the blogs and chats with my mommy friends are sinking in. You don't have to do it the way its always been done. You can actually do something that works for you and your family even if its not considered normal or in the majority. We skipped some blood work and regular testing when I was pregnant with Zach that I didn't realize I had the option of skipping with the other two boys. Zach sleeps right next to our bed and spent many nights in bed with us. I'm looking at curriculum to home school Ben with all the kids in mind and my most recent deviation from the norm was skipping one of Zachs routine shots. I used to think that parents that didn't vaccinate their children were irresponsible. They were putting their children at risk to make a point to.....someone and one day their kids would get sick with something preventable and they would be sorry. Now all I can focus on is story after story of kids getting shots and hours or days later they are half paralyzed, have seizure disorders or are dead.

That takes me to his six month appointment thats coming up in 2 weeks. Zach is due for a 3 in 1 shot and 2 individual shots. At the same time Ellie will have her 15 month appointment and is also due for 3 shots.

I recently heard that some vaccinations contain aborted human cells. That, on top of autism being in the news again, got me thinking. If 1 in 88 boys develops autism, and if some parents think that shots are a trigger for autism, maybe I should read up on what I'm letting them inject into my son before they do anything more to him. A friend of mine has done a ton of research and pointed me in the direction of a few websites with unbiased pros and cons. When I say unbiased, I mean the people that made the vaccination, conduct the studies on it and then profit from the use of the the vaccinations are not affiliated with these websites.

While some (Hep B) almost seem pointless, others (Hib) are a bit more complicated. If Hep B is transmitted by drug users sharing dirty needles, mothers or promiscuous behavior, why would a newborn need the shot before he leaves the hospital when the mother is negative? Why would you give a healthy child a shot for a disease he is not currently at risk for that could leave him with: soreness, fatigue, headache, dizziness, anorexia, tingling, hypotension, lymphadenopathy, abdominal pain/cramps, diarrhea, nausea, vomiting, rash, sweating, muscle pain/stiffness, back pain, stiffness in the arms or neck, chills, weakness, anaphylaxis, encephalitis, MS, vertigo, palpitations, abnormal liver functions and yes, the list goes on.

Then you have Hib which prevents meningitis. Some possible reactions are: fever, pain and swelling at injection site. Rash, hives, irritability, restless sleep, prolonged crying, diarrhea, vomiting, loss of appetite, collapse, shock and Guillain-Barre syndrome. Jon actually had meningitis when he was a baby. How did he get it? If he can get it so can Zach right? Obviously viral (which is more common) is less severe than bacterial, but do the risks of the shot outweigh the possibility of the disease?

I'm going down the lists of shots one by one and am terrified of making the wrong decision. All of my kids are fine to this point so why should I think Zach would be any different? What if I skip the shots and he does end up with something I could have prevented? I wouldn't forgive myself. What if I give him the shot and he has a reaction? I wouldn't forgive myself.

I still have a lot of research to go through, a lot of conversations to have with Jon, maybe my mother in law who used to be a pediatric nurse and our pediatrician (who is informative, unbiased and willing to delay or skip shots if we request it, thank goodness). I'm nervous and buried in medical jargon, but I feel empowered that I'm finally making an informed decision for my babies because I think its right, not because the doctor said so.